Mom-Part 5

The grandkids loved to look at grandma's dolls!

Holding Amanda...check out her nails

Mom with one of her students....he wrote in a card..."thank you for being in this picture. It really made me feel better. You are my favorite reading teacher."

Mom-Part 4

Mom Memories and Tidbits:

The scar on her face...she was bitten by a scotty dog as an infant

In 1957, she danced on Perry Como’s TV show

Jessica remembers how mom got into holiday decorations, all her cows and how she would find a reason to walk through the living room to look at the dolls. She also remembers how she “booped” and would laugh, her angel pin which she wore daily. her jewelry and how she dressed cute. She knew she could always get a hug from grandma and enjoyed cuddling on the couch.

Patti: “Mom worked 2, sometimes 3 jobs to give us anything and everything we ever wanted."

How the neighbors on 339 would gather at our house for coffee frequently just to chit-chat

Her fake, long nails....always polished. When she finally got rid of them she couldn’t use the typewriter as well!

She filled Christmas stockings like no one else. They were awesome!

Her cow collection-who can forget this?! Mom had every cow thing imaginable-including a mooing cow toilet seat and a cow udder soap dispenser. Mom’s friend Chris Harrer always had a cow trinket to give mom every time she saw her.

How farting or even talking about farting made her laugh...really hard! When she laughed, she farted which would make her laugh more...you see the cycle??

Making Christmas cookies

She was a Buffalo Belle, now called the Buffalo Jills

Chocolate milk-she drank it every night

She tended to cover her ears when blowing out her birthday cakes

How she loved odd foods like potato pancakes and mince meat pie, but how she didn’t like peanut butter or ketchup!

Mom and dad dancing to “Satin Doll” at weddings

Her lunches-half of a banana and 1 slice of ham

She loved the zoo...especially the gorillas

Her spaghetti sauce...she wasn’t Italian but her meatballs and sauce were great! We had pasta every Sunday and leftovers on Monday.

Billy Hoppe remembers “When we went to Subway she always, after staring at the menu for a few moments, settled on the ham sub! Always!”

“I always thought she would make an awesome reporter, as she knew EVERYONE. I can't comprehend how anyone could know so many people and know them well, too. And she always spoke to you like you also knew them! She would tell all these stories using first names. I had no idea who they were!

I was also always impressed she remembered everyone's birthday. I still have the lottery card she gave me a few years ago!

What else do I remember? Coshway on Halloween. It was always a big deal when you guys came over at night and visited! There's too much stuff! She's was a kind, special lady we love and miss! She was like another mom or aunt. I don't know if anyone outside my family was closer to us.”

I don’t remember much of this, but I know she dyed her hair...alot!

How she could cook a holiday meal for 40 people and have all the food come out at the exact same time...well, except for the rolls-which she burned every meal!

Lexie remembers being together at the canal fest and sitting down at the Niagara River eating ice cream. She loved swimming the in pool with grandma. She also said "she would always get you what you asked for most of all."

How she remembered everyone’s birthdays and anniversaries...without even looking at the calendar! She had her own system and it was amazing. She never missed one! We used to joke that she should buy stock in Hallmark because she bought so many cards.

How stubborn she was

How she loved to do crossword puzzles...in the bathroom!

Rachel remembers "when we sat together at the kitchen table at Grandma's and read books to each other."

Rosalie remembers: “My first job I worked at Taylor Devices (a job your mom got for me). I worked everyday stuffing envelopes in the backroom. Carol would then drive me to the post office to mail the envelopes and then dropped me off at my house. Our rides to the post office were always pleasant and truly my only “alone time” I ever had with your mom. I don’t remember what we actually talked about, but I do remember her car seemed enormous. I also remember being miffed by how she was able to moke those extra long cigarettes with the ashes perfectly balanced on the end of them...while steering the car.”

After she quit smoke she got addicted to something else....tic tacs!

How she liked to change furniture around, change how the pictures were hung and re-paint rooms.

Spencer remembers going in the pool with Grandma

How easily she could cry-at Oprah, a commercial or a sappy card.

Her love for the Canal Fest. She was there every single day. She saved quarters all year for the quarter game and also loved the game “I Got It.” Mom, dad and the Parkhills would sit on the bridge between Tonawanda and North Tonawanda people watching. Mom loved seeing people she hadn’t seen in several years. On Tuesday of Canal Fest week was the parade. Mom loved parades and this was one of her favorites! She would get there super early to save a spot...not just for us, but Patti and her crew and usually a few of the neighbors as well.

Gary remembers Grandma: “ There isn’t a time I can recall that we weren’t having fun or laughing together. Your heart and pool was always open and I took full advantage of both. I learned that you were a fighter who never lost her sense of humor and love for her family.” Gary also said "I had just gotten my permit and grandma met us for dinner at Olive Garden. She let me drive her car home. I knew she was pretty nervous letting me drive, but she trusted me to the fullest and after we got homeshe complimented me on my driving (even though I was a little touchy on the gas). It doesn't seem like a big deal but at the time it meant a whole lot to have someone trust me like that and then compliment me."

How good she was at remembering details...even silly ones. Mom would often go off on a long tangent about someone. It would go something like this...”you remember Mrs. Smith-she was the one who taught me how to ride my bike when I lived on Delaware. Her daughter is married to Jim who is friends with Bob. You know Bob-he went to school with John. He’s got that cute, little dog that barks alot....” It would go on for a while. She’d remember phone numbers and zip codes and you would just have to sit there listening shaking your head. If you said that you didn’t know the person or didn’t remember them, her tangent went on longer to try and make you remember. :)

Dianna McEldowney: “Everytime I saw your mother, she made me smile.”

You know how sometimes you get the things in the mail from March of Dimes or an organization like that asking you to collect money from your neighbors? Well, mom actually went around collecting every time she got one of those in the mail. If a neighbors family member was sick or passed away, mom went around collecting money for flowers or making meals for the family in need.

Mrs. Hoppe will always remember mom’s kindness. She was a great long-time friend.

When mom was thinking or working hard, she’d stick her tongue out and we’d all make fun of her.

The first time Daryl came over for dinner, she told me I was going to marry him!

She always wore her bikini in the summer...she even ironed in her bikini and one time burned her stomach with the side of the iron. She wore her flowered Hawaiian shirt for a cover-up. I saved that.

Alyssa: “..you welcomed Matt and me into your home, showered us with smiles and hugs and made sure we knew that if we ever wanted to take a trip to Buffalo, we had a place to stay. You were always the first person to call to see how Kristen and I did on a test and were always calming us down when we were convinced we failed.”

She spent her summers on the pool deck, sun bathing or entertaining neighbors or family members. Our pool was a hang out. Mom would quickly hop in the pool to cool off...but she never wanted to get her hair wet.

How she knew everyone in Tonawanda and probably half of Buffalo. She was also good at making friends with strangers. She’d just randomly get into conversations with people and befriend them. Example-the truckers she met at the railroad on July 4. They were from the state of Mexico just passing through. There was an old steam engine going by that day and mom went down to go check it out. No one else would go with her because we thought it was dumb. That’s where she met the truckers. She came home and told us she met some nice truckers from Mexico and was thinking about going back to get them and bring them to our house. Dad thought she was crazy, but she went. They ended up spending the day with us and they kept in touch for many years.

She was a great judge of character.

Kim remembers that mom was appauled that we didn't iron our T-shirts in college...she used to iron everything...even underwear back in the day.

Joe remembers when mom first met dad, he would come over for those big, delicious dinners around the table. He felt welcomed by mom. Once he had mentioned how he like Cameo cookies. “After that, every time we came for dinner you had cameo cookies for me. I loved that. The fact that you remembered that little detail among all those children.”

Whenever I was discouraged or bummed, mom would encourage me and tell me everything was going to be ok...it made me feel better everytime. I miss this alot! Sometimes I just want to call her up and tell her my saga and hear her tell me that things are going to be fine and everything will work out.

How she loooved to decorate for the holidays...every holiday...even the holidays people don’t usually decorate for. She had more decorations than anyone else I know. Her cement goose that stayed on the porch year round was always decorated according to the season or holiday. Everything in the house was decorated too. She had so many Christmas decorations we would start decorating the day after Thanksgiving and it would usually take 2-3 days to finish. That’s not including the outside lights, blow up yard ornaments or Christmas tree! Sometimes I was grouchy about having to take so much time to decorate, but mom really loved it. It was something that made her happy. She especially loved when the grandkids came over because they enjoyed the decorations just as much as her! One of her favorite things was the Dickens Village. Her collection grew to be quite big and mom took her time setting up the little village. It was beautiful.

She loved planning her high school reunions. The last one she was involved in was her 50th. Mom loved reconnecting with old friends. Patti and I joke that she would absolutely love Facebook!

Mom was good about keeping in touch, or at least asking about, our friends as well. Some of our friends grew up on Coshway or Wadsworth Ct. They felt like part of the family too. Years later, many would stop by to say hello-like Dianna McEldowney, Blaine or Debbie Lilac or Daryl Smith.

Tracy remembers: “ While it seemed like dad was gone forever and mom only worked and took care of us, things started changing when mom started going out at night. We were old enough to care for ourselves, and I remember those weekend nights sitting up in mom’s bedroom while she got ready. It was the same routine each time. I’d watch her put on her makeup (and those big false eyelashes), pick out her clothes, curl up her hair and put it all together. Mom was so beautiful when she dressed up! The big thing was she liked to drink a big glass of chocolate milk while she was getting ready. It always sat on the dresser and I have no memory of it ever spilling! But, I can tell you that it was a HUGE thing to be the one to make the chocolate milk. I felt like it was a special privilege and that mom was somehow entrusting that to one of us. I don’t know what made it a big deal, but I do remember so wanting to the be the one that made it and brought it to her. Some of my best times talking to mom were while I was sitting on her bed watching her get dressed. I used to leave her little notes under her bathrobe while she was gone so she would see the note when she got home. My notes would always tell mom how much I loved her and how beautiful she was and how much I missed her when she was gone.

More from Tracy: “I’ll never forget te day when mom bought me my first pair of panty house. We were going to a party across the street on Coshway. Mom already bought me really nice patent leather shoes-and they even had a heal on them! Then mom came home with panty hose for me!!! They were the kind that you had to wear the garter belt with and I remember mom teaching me how to put them on. I knew I had to do it right because I could easily put a run in them and I knew I wouldn’t be getting a new pair soon. I felt like such a big girl, I just couldn’t believe it! The boys were all making fun of me -mocking my new panty hose. I remember mom telling them to stop bothering me. It was a big day for me!”

Tracy: “So, growing up, we always had matching outfits for every holiday or big occasion. It wasn’t anything we ever thought about, we just knew it was going to be that way. On Christmas eve we had matching pajamas, on Easter it was usually a pantsuit or dress with huge pink sleeves. We even had matching snowsuits to wear walking to school!”

She was at our wedding and we were so thankful. Mom had lived almost 1.5 years with stage 4 lung cancer. I know she wouldn’t have missed it for the world. I know mom was struggling at this point-she was in pain and tired, yet she threw me a wonderful wedding shower, helped me plan things and found my wedding dress. She had driven to Rochester one day to go dress shopping with me. I had found 1 in Buffalo that I liked, but was still unsure. We went all over that day but I didn’t find anything...until the last store. I was looking around and mom saw a dress on the mannequin. She immediately called me over. I knew right then that was the dress I would wear. It was just as I had imagined! I wish mom would have been feeling better and have been able to be involved more in our wedding-such as going with us to get our hair done or helping me make the favors, but I think she was using all of her energy just to be there. For that, I am thankful!

She could sew well. She used her mother’s old singer sewing machine. She never felt a need to buy a new, easier to use machine. She would often make Sal, John, Tracy, Danine and Patti matching outfits. She made me many Halloween costumes and odds and ends. Mom started sewing Lexie a pair of PJ’s before she passed. She had material for Spencer and Rachel too-she just never got the chance to finish.

Mom was tough sometimes, but she did love her family.

She saved everything-cards, newspaper articles, every piece of school work her kids ever did.

She was so proud of John when he got Paramedic of the Year. We went to Florida for the ceremony. Afterwards, mom sent away to something in Florida to request every newspaper article from the whole state that told about John’s achievement. She also put an article in the Tonawanda News.

Mom wanted to be around to see me have children. I was the only kid left to have kids of my own and she didn’t want to miss it. She started buying baby items for me before I even had a boyfriend. Daryl and I weren’t even engaged and she was talking to us about babies. Daryl and I were at the Canal Fest craft show with her one year-this was before we were engaged and before she received her diagnosis. She saw a stand that she had bought from before for her a couple of the other grandkids...it was crib comforters. A long time before that, I had mentioned randomly that Noah’s Ark would be a cute nursery theme. Mom remembered this and insisted on buying a Precious Moments Noah’s Ark crib comforter and pillow. Daryl was a little shocked or shall I say scared! Since that time, she has bought our future baby enough stuff to fill up 3 big rubbermaid totes-many of which is Noah’s Ark themed. During mom’s last few days she was worried about not being around to see our kids. Daryl reassured her that she would have the best seat in the house to see them. When I would ask mom what I could do to make her feel better, she would say “tell me you’re pregnant.” That was only 1 month into our marriage. It was sweet, because I knew she just wanted to be part of that time in our lives. At the time mom was buying all our baby things, I thought she was nuts, but now we are so thankful for the very special items from Grandma that our kids will one day have and we look forward to decorating our Noah’s Ark nursery.

Mom was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer is March of 2006 ??? just a few weeks before Jared’s accident. Mom didn’t ever let on how scared she was. Like always, she tried to be tough and put together so that those around her would not be sad or scared. Mom went through almost 1.5 years of chemo and radiation. She never got sick and never let it take her down. Looking back I don’t know how she did it. She still maintained her routine, taking care of the house and caring for herself. She was on the roof as usual at Christmas hanging lights, driving to Rochester to visit me and mowing the lawn. She eventually lost most of her hair. She was hoping it would come in thicker and curly. She hated her straight, thin hair and always wished for hair like mine. Her wish came true! Mom’s hair came in course, black and kinky! And to her surprise she hated it! It was too hard to manage. She ended up getting a really cute haircut that looked great on her. Mom only wore a wig for a short time. It looked very natural on her. Towards the end of her life, things did become difficult for mom. It was harder to take care of herself and she was losing energy and in a great deal of pain. She was still stubborn though and didn’t want much help from anyone. The Hoppe’s took good care of her. Billy, despite his dislike for dogs, took care of Emma every day. Mrs. Hoppe would bring her dinners and visit and Mr. Hoppe would take out the garbage and do things around the house. Those are just a few of many things they did for her. They took wonderful care of her and loved her like their own family. I called mom every morning on my way to work. At this point, it was hard for her to get out of bed and start her day. I know she looked forward to my call and so did I. One morning in late June or early July mom didn’t answer the phone. I called frantically over and over and over and still no answer. I called Patti and she immediately head over there. I called and talked to Mrs. Hoppe. She reassured me that Mr. Hoppe was just at the house. Although he didn’t see my mom because she was still in bed, things seemed to be fine. But I knew they weren’t. Finally, she answered but didn’t sound good. She said that she heard the phone ringing but her body wouldn’t move. Hoppe’s arrived shortly after and so did Patti. They called 9-1-1. As it turned out, mom had a stroke and heart attack. Thankfully, neither was significant. Mom had some apraxia-saying the wrong word for things-and had difficulty using her right hand. She had to re-learn somethings such as writing her name, using a spoon or dialing the telephone, but we worked on it. She eventually was transferred to the rehab unit and had to start OT and PT which she wasn’t a fan of! While we were in the hospital, it became more necessary than ever that mom couldn’t go home without help. The plan was for Hospice to work with mom-sending in a caregiver to help her get ready in the mornings and to help with meals and housework. Mom agreed she needed this. As it got closer for mom to be discharged from the hospital, it was evident that she was going to need a lot more help. Patti wanted her to stay at her house, but mom really wanted to go home. Jeanne graciously decided to leave her family and come take care of mom full time. It was an answer to prayer! Mom was very much looking forward to leaving the hospital and get back to the house and so thankful Jeanne would be with her. Hospice set up a hospital bed in the family room so mom wouldn’t have to negotiate the stairs. It was clear at this point, that mom was nearing the end. Although I knew it was coming, I really didn’t want to believe it. A couple days after Jeanne was home with mom, Patti and I decided to stay at the house as well. This was just a little over a month after our wedding so I was thankful Daryl was so understanding. Mom slept alot, but was still alert for many days. She had many visitors, but we could tell it was draining for her. Eventually when people started calling to visit, she would say “please tell them thank you, but not today.” She was getting weaker and eating and drinking less and less. Although, there were funny moments where she would wake up and have a craving-like a cup of coffee or potato sticks. She hadn’t eaten for a couple of days, but then wolfed down a plate of Mrs. Hoppe’s sauce. She still enjoyed seeing the grandkids. It was hard for them to see her so sick. I think they were scared at times, but Lexie was not. She would climb right up in bed with mom and hug her. She even painted her nails one day. There is alot more to her last days, but I think we all have our own special moments with her that we will never forget. On July 23, 2007, mom took her last breath on earth and first one in Heaven. She will never be forgotten.

Mom-Part 3

FROM PATTI:

Things I will always remember about Mom. The full Christmas tree every Christmas. The matching pajamas we always wore - a tradition I adopted with my children. Getting caught "stealing" Santa and the elf from the lamp in the living room to sleep with. I will never forget the Christmas Eve parties Mom and Dad always had on Coshway. Me and Danine always had to “Try” and go to bed while the party was going on. While Sal John and Tracy snuck out to midnight mass. Then came the yell – “SANTAS HERE SANTAS HERE!” We would jump out of bed and inevitably always just miss him! So we would get up and open our presents. Eventually get scurried back off to bed until the morning when we could again wake up to play with our toys. I remember the “staples” always found in an overstuffed stocking every year. Nail clippers, emery boards, freshen up gum, toe socks, toothbrush. Oh so much fun – never could get everything back in. Later seeing the ping pong table just bursting with the gifts she bought for everyone. She started shopping in July for Christmas and there was such thought but into everything she bought. Did she go overboard? Absolutely but that was MOM! Sneaking me a Christmas stocking so no one else knew. I remember every Christmas making cookies with Mom, Kristen, Me, Lexie, Rachel, Gary and Spencer. Rudolph never made it out of the process in one piece. There was always more flour and frosting on Mom and the girls than anything. Sprinkles everywhere in the kitchen
The valentines chocolate heart next to my cereal bowl every valentine’s day because she left for work before we got up for school. The Saturdays we spent going between Kenmore Dance Studio where Me Tracy and Danine took dance and Kenmore Lanes where John and Sal bowled. Every summer going to Crystal Beach for Tonawanda Days with the Hogenkamps. I remember Mom reading to me from the Children’s Bible on the floor in the living room when I was in kindergarten. Falling asleep on her butt on the couch when she laid down for a nap. Whenever Mom left for any extended period of time I had to take her pillow because it smelled like her and it made me feel safe to sleep with it. (by the way....that’s where Mom's pillow is incase anyone was looking for it!) I have it old habits’ die hard! :-). Every Easter making Chocolate. The bowling bunny never made it in one piece (see a pattern here?) All the summer days at the pool Steve trying to throw everyone in Dom trying to get on a raft. All the bar b ques in the back yard with the frozen rolls. HMMM frozen rolls in the summer and burned rolls every Christmas! ODD? The first time Mom met Steve, he was laying on the floor in the family room watching a football game - Mom went to step over him and ripped one! HELLO! Once Mom started laughing we all knew what was coming next - more toots and then the teeth! Her taking out her teeth and shinning the flash light under her chin. I remember the endless arguments about going swimming. When we were young and calling her at Taylor Devices or when we were older on Wadsworth sneaking out of the house hoping Kristen the nark didn’t catch us so we could go in Sellers or Marinolas pool. I remember all the company picnics we went to at Taylor Devices but no one else had kids except Jill Fritz so we all became friends with the Fritz family. Jill Fritz is the one who hosted Mom’s Baby Shower for Kristen at her house on Ward Road In NT. During the blizzard of ’77 Mom was stuck on Tonawanda Island cause they thought everyone had left so she was stuck there with Rosanne Piccio until someone with a truck got them off the island. My Birthday was during that time and mom hadn’t bought me a present yet so she walked from our house on Coshway to Convenient to buy me a birthday present. She bought me tiddly winks and comic books. She again re-gifted the tiddly winks to me on my 30th birthday and when cleaning out Mom’s basement I found my comic books. I was sooo excited! I remember Mom at everyone of my games that I cheered at whether it was basketball football wresting didn’t matter she was there home or away rain or shine! Mom Dom and Kris came the cheering competitions every year at Wilson none more important than my senior year when I didn’t make the finals for individuals and she had to pick me up off the ground. When I became a coach she was still there at every game and every competition cheering on my girls!
I remember everyone walking around Wadsworth Ct. in their robes to coffee clotch at each other’s houses in the morning. I remember Mom making the curtains for Gary’s bedroom when I was pregnant so his room could all be Mickey Mouse. I remember her and Dom always being the first ones to the hospital when I had any of the kids. All the miscues with hair color she used to have----Pink hair, White hair, deep deep red almost purple hair. You name it she had it! But then again I am catching up! I miss her talking to me on the phone all the way home every day from work. She would listen to me rant and rave for the full 40 minute drive if I had to. She always would listen!

She loved to spoil all her children and her grandchildren they could do no wrong. She loved to listen to Rachel say Purpow Berd that carried a puse! She loved to read with the kids do math flash cards or just sit and play with her dickens village with them! All the years at the canal fest pay one price ride days. Always the hottest day of the year and she was there with me every year! she had to go with me - she had to take the kids on the Marry –go-round cause it made me sick to stand next to the horse and hold them on! Mom sending Dom down to the parade at 1 in the afternoon to save "our" seats! The Craft show every Saturday and Sunday! and then the fireworks to round out the week. How completely appropriate that she would wait to go “home” till after the canal fest ended! We knew - we all knew she would not go home till it was over. Even from her bed she didn't miss the parade - we watched it the next day on cable! LOL talk about torture - she loved it. It wasn't always easy with Mom we all had our disagreements but that was who Mom was and who she raised us all to be strong and independent and boy that came back to bite her didn't it? That final week all the laughs and long talks we all had with her alone or all together. She was so concerned that she didn't buy Spencer a birthday present! The day she grabbed my arm so hard I had to look to see who did it! (she really had something important to say!)! LOL. She even allowed me to brush her teeth that morning, did you know that? Jeannie and I had given her a sponge bath and changed her clothes and I decided to brush her teeth. But I couldn't do it because she had her lips so clenched I couldn’t get the toothbrush in. So I told her "come on Mom open up I can't get to your teeth you're worse than Specer!" She immediately opened her lips and gave me that cheap fake smile (oh you all know what I mean!) so I could get to her teeth!
The song that was on the TV the moment she left us at 2:30 Monday July 23. Home by Chris Daughtry. Did she do it on purpose? I believe she did as a final gift to let us know she was going to be ok! Cause in true Mom fashion she worried about each and every one of us right till the very end!
We all have a lot of Mom in us. Ok some of us more than others but, we all do in the little things we do...whether it's matching Christmas pajamas, the items in the stockings, the valentines chocolates, or the simple little ways we show we love someone, Mom will always live on and be remembered for being our Mom and we will make sure Kristen and Daryl’s children know their Grandma Carol! I could go on and on forever and bore everyone but what I will always remember most is how much she loved us all how incredibly stubborn she was and how stunningly beautiful she was. I had more fun with her as we got older than I think we ever did when I lived at home. Too much alike to live in the same house I guess. She stood up for what she thought was right and you weren’t going to convince her otherwise. How many times did her computer go on NL?? But no matter what she loved us all. And we All Loved Her!

Mom Part 2

Mom married Sal Oddo at Holy Angels Church on June 13, 1959. I remember mom talking about what a big wedding it was. She had Sal on 7/10/60, John on 9/1/61, Tracy on 10/4/62, Danine on 7/17/65 and Patti on 1/30/67. She married Dad on May 12, 1979 down at the river. She had me on 6/23/79.

Mom enjoyed "watching my children go through various stages-crawling, walking, getting teeth, talking and loosing teeth." She liked the tooth thing so much that she saved every tooth each one of us ever lost. I found them in her dresser drawer! Mom recognized that she was very overprotective, maybe a little too much. When asked to write some motherly advice she said “try not to be as overprotective as I was. Give them morals, take them to church and practice your love of the Lord in all you do, in prayer and everyday living.”

Mom loved children-those she worked with at Fletcher and her grandkids. She enjoyed watching them grow and learn. She loved seeing them on Halloween all dressed up and always remembered their birthdays and special events. When asked what she liked about being a grandma, mom said “I like interacting with my grandkids in ways I didn’t know before. I love their kisses and the love they show. As with my own children, I love watching them grow and mature.”
Mom saved every child’s drawing or homemade card she ever received, she saved thank you notes written by the grandkids, letters from students she worked with and every single silly little Christmas gift that the grandkids gave her...you know, the ones the kids buy for 50 cents at school. I remember one Christmas as we were decorating I found a rusty old tin with a Christmas moose on it. I said “can we please throw this out? It’s falling apart!” She refused saying that so and so gave it to her and that she could never throw it away!

Here is a letter mom wrote to her grandkids and great grandkids:

“To my grandchildren and great grandchildren,

Always love and respect your parents regardless of your differences. Make sure God is in your life in every way-keep your morality. Do your best in everything you do. Follow your dreams-they do come true. Avoid negative people or people who could lead you in the wrong direction. Love and respect others. Live your life to its fullest, trying not to have any regrets. Choose your friends wisely. Remember cleanliness is important. Surround yourself with positive people and all the positive aspects of life. Have fun, have a healthy and happy life and enjoy your family and friends.”

Mom’s Favorites:

TV Show: Golden Girls

I also remember her loving Raymond, Law and Order

and American Idol-she always rooted for the underdogs-Mom would often go over to the Hoppe’s or call them after the show to discuss the results.

Singer: Jack Jones, Johnny Mathis

Mom loved her records. I remember when I was younger

she would make me sit and listen to her records...which I

hated, but she wanted to teach me what “real music” was.

Sandwich: Pizza sub

Food: Patti’s chicken and dumplings

Color: Blue, Peach

Vacation: Hawaii

Season: Summer

Flower: Carnation

Memories: Vacations, visiting John and his family in Florida, Macy’s Day Parade with Kristen. Every year when we watched the Thanksgiving Day parade on TV, mom would say how she always wanted to go to it. In 2003, I was living in Tarrytown, NY...about 45 minutes from the city. So, that Thanksgiving mom and dad came to visit me and mom and I planned to go to the parade. Dad was ill at the time and didn’t think he could stand walking all over the city so he stayed back to cook dinner. Mom was sooo excited-like a little girl. We took the first train into the city-I don't remember what time it was, but it was dark. We were one of the first people there and got a front row spot right by Toys R Us. It turned out to be a pretty warm day so we didn’t freeze. We watched the whole parade and mom took pictures of literally everything that went by. I’m sure she cried at some point, because she was so happy! Back at home, we figured out that my oven didn’t work. Dad had the turkey breast in my oven for over 8 hours and it was still cold...so we ate the sides hoping that the turkey would be done later. It never made it. It was something we all laughed about for years. That was our one and only turkey-less Thanksgiving!

When were you the....

Happiest: when my children were born

Most scared: when I was told I had a malignant tumor

That was a tough day. Patti and I were with mom at Dr. Lang’s office when we first heard the diagnosis. Mom was strong and comforting Patti and I who were very upset. She never let on...

Saddest: When my mom and dad passed away

Most nervous: raising my children and worrying about them when they were not in my immediate care.