The last 2 mother's days I missed mom, but was still hopeful that I'd be a mom soon. This year, mom is still gone and I'm struggling to have hope that I'll ever be a mom. The thought of Mother's Day this year has left me feeling broken. I've been doing alot of reflecting about the holiday these past couple days. I've been feeling sorry for myself-no mom, no kids-and I've realized that is completely selfish. I know the reality is that it hurts-I miss my mom and I miss not having kids. I know the day will bring it's tough moments, but I don't want that to consume my day. Wallowing in my own pity when really, I have alot to be thankful for on Mother's Day even if my mom's in Heaven and I have no kids. I had a great mom who took good care of me and loved me. Even though I can't buy her a gift or give her a big hug, I can still celebrate her. I will remember the special times we shared when we were together and I'll think of her and all the other moms having the best celebration in Heaven. I can be thankful for the women in my life who love and care for me and do their best to look out for me, like a mom does. I will celebrate Daryl's mothers. Without them, I wouldn't have my best friend.
On Mother's Day, I will focus my prayers on the children all around the world who have never known their moms, or who have lost their moms at an early age. I look at all the horrible things going on in the world-Earthquakes, war, disease, poverty and think of all those kids who are all alone. I'll think of the children and adults that have moms who treat them poorly. I'll be praying that they someday know what true love is, if they don't already. Finally, I'll be praying for all the women who long to be moms and aren't yet. I pray that you will find joy in this day and remember what it's all about.
Although I have been dreading this day for weeks now, I can honestly say that I'm thankful for it. Thankful for what God showed me and thankful for all the mom's-those alive, passed or still waiting.
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